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I recently had a woman tell me that she finds my messages hard to take. She said when she reads something I post about my childhood, she can't comprehend going through such a life and it makes her feel uncomfortable.
As we talked about it, she realized she was using my stories to rationalize her childhood. During our conversation she said things such as, "I thought it was awful to have to live with XXX until I read one of your posts and then I realized my life wasn't so bad." I reminded her that trauma is trauma, there is no trauma that is better or worse than what someone else experienced as their trauma. Feeling guilty about wanting to express sadness, guilt, fear, anger, blame or shame only means you are holding those negative emotions inside you. Allowing yourself to express what you're thinking and be honest with how you're really feeling about it will set you free. I explained to her that because I've learned to do the inner work and have healed from the negative experiences of my past, I am now able to use my experiences as teachable moments without the emotional triggers. I am able to show proof that we don't have to carry the experiences of the past around with us. If we do, it only keeps us from enjoying who we are. I would not be able to teach what I teach if I hadn't had the experiences I did and learned to heal from them. We all have the choice to continue feeling like a victim and blaming others for who we've become or to choose to let go of victim beliefs and live in our power. We are all more powerful than we know, we all have the ability to see ourselves as the gifted and talented person we are. The ONLY reason we can't see our gifts and our talents is because we're holding onto a belief that is keeping us from knowing who we are. My mother once said to me that she and I used to clash when I got to a certain age. I suggested she look at that memory with a different perspective. We didn't clash, I simply got to a point where I no longer believed I was the person she kept telling me I was. When I was no longer willing to believe I was worthless and would always be worthless, what she describes as us clashing is actually her inability to understand why I no longer saw my value the way she saw my value. If you are having difficulty allowing yourself the honesty of what you're feeling because you've been taught to keep it to yourself, I encourage you to give yourself the gift of loving who you are. Everything you're keeping bottled up inside of you is building momentum. The question you have to ask yourself is, "do you want that momentum to explode in happiness or more sorrow? We all have free will, you can choose to suffer in silence or you can choose to free your mind. #LifeIsAllAboutChoices There has never been a better time for people to do the inner work we all came here to do and experience the love of who we are! Nancy Mueller ~ Life Sensei
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Nancy MuellerLife Sensei • Author • Founder of Mastering Your Beliefs Archives
August 2026
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The sensei picked up the teapot and began to pour tea into one of the cups.
When the cup was full, she kept pouring and soon tea was running down the sides of the cup and into the tray. The student pointed to the cup and said, “Stop, can’t you see the cup is full and no more will go in?” The sensei smiled and said, “Like this cup, your mind is full of what you believe and don’t believe. Before you can learn more, you must empty your cup to make room. |
Every reflection in the Attic Journal is an invitation to notice the beliefs, identities, and stories quietly shaping our experience. Not to fix them... but to see them clearly. Because what is seen through awareness no longer has to be carried unconsciously.
If today's reflection resonated with you, I'd love to continue the conversation.
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Attic: A metaphor for the mind where memories, beliefs, identities, and stories are stored.
Awareness doesn't clear the attic by force.
It simply remembers it was never confined by it.