The morning started out like any other but the choice I was making will forever change the course of my life. I waited in line to be handed my ticket just like I do at the post office; the only difference was, this time I was waiting in line to begin divorce proceedings instead of waiting to mail a package.
As I stood in line, waiting for my turn, I thought about my drive to the courthouse, parking my car, walking through security, searching for the floor where Family Court is held and wondering what all the other people standing in line with me were dealing with. No one looks into the eyes of another person, there is no talking, heads are bowed low and you wonder what others, standing in line with you are thinking.
When I finally reached the window, the bored employee behind the bullet proof glass began to look over my paperwork. I couldn't help but wonder what had happened in this room to warrant bullet proof glass! After determining that my paperwork was in order, I was informed that he cost to file would be $450; why is filing for divorce so much more expensive than a marriage license?
I kept reminding myself to BREATHE and remembering to hold on to the light at the end of the tunnel because I know it is the key to getting through this.
The clerk barely looks you in the eye, he sees this type of situation every day that he reports to work. His job is to move people through the line, not to give reassurance. He hands me my ticket, mumbles something about waiting for my number to be called and is already beginning to do the same for the person in line behind me.
As I sit there, waiting for my ticket number to be called, I keep reminding myself of what a good person I am. I have made this decision because I know it is what is best for me and I must remember that if I am going to get through this I must continue to believe in myself and love myself. I brought a book to read during my wait but I am unable to concentrate. My thoughts keep drifting back to my wedding day and how I thought it would be my "happily ever after!" As I reminisce about that day, my thoughts are brought back to why I have made this decision and I realize that the love and happiness in my life comes from within and not because of someone else. I know that I have the Inner Strength to grow from this experience just as I have grown from past experiences in my life. The "positive" that is within me begins to swell within my heart until it reaches my mind and puts a smile on my face.
I believe that divorce can be viewed as opportunity or sadness but if you remember that every ending is an opportunity for a New Beginning you begin to realize that you absolutely have choices in your life!
You made the choice to say, "I Do" and now you are making the choice to say, "I Don't Any More" so what is your next step towards your New Beginning?
Think of this journey as a staircase, success will come from being willing to take the next step.
Step #1 ~ Your Health: Have you neglected yourself in this area and if so, what one step will you commit to doing to improve your health? You are the most important person in your life and you owe yourself the power of a healthy body. What negative habits have you fallen into that you will want to change on this journey to the top?
Step #2 ~ Your "SELF": Keep in mind that your life is all about YOU now so what one step will you commit to doing to be kind and loving to yourself? When was the last time you took time for yourself or put YOU first on your To Do List? Your playing small does not serve the world. What habits will you change to show you and the world that you matter and that, moving forward, every choice you make will be out of love for your "self." How can you expect love and respect from others if you don't know how to give it to yourself first? Make a choice right now to say "I LOVE ME" and all of my decisions will be made for my highest good. If you need help getting started, CLICK HERE and begin with the I Love Me journal.
Step #3 ~ Your Wealth: It is time to look at the gifts that you possess and live your passion. What are you most passionate about? How can you create a career living your passion and sharing your talents and gifts with the world? Now that you are ready to be self-preserving by putting your needs and wants first, what does that look like for your career?
In all 3 of these areas, make a list of what is working for you and what is not working for you. Many people want to bring about positive changes in their lives but aren't sure where to start. Too many people concentrate on what they DON'T want instead of what they DO want. What will it take to give you the Courage, Confidence and Confirmation that you can DO, BE or HAVE anything you desire? If you aren't sure where to start, CLICK HERE and listen to any of the archived interviews. These women are sharing concepts and philosophies that could be the key to empower you to take your next step. Have you thought about what LOVING yourself really means? CLICK HERE to understand why this is so important and can actually help you run up those steps towards your goal.
Here is the most important thing to remember as you walk your journey through divorce, surround yourself with people who inspire you and who will encourage you to NEVER GIVE UP! Stay away from friends and family members who want to sit and commiserate with you for they are not helping you move forward.
People you thought were so supportive in the past will seem to drift out of your life but this is more about them and their choices than about you. Knowing this will hopefully encourage you to seek new opportunities for friendships and mentors. Remember, LIFE IS ALL ABOUT CHOICES... you can choose to stay in bed under the covers or you can choose to Party Like Purple every day and put some life in your living. BREATHE and always look for the light at the end of the tunnel.
Speaker, Author, Life Coach, Radio Show Host at Life's About Choices Radio on iHeart internet radio
In his 2014 commencement address at the MUM Graduation, Jim Carrey talked about getting what you want out of life...
"The imagination is always creating scenarios, both good and bad and the ego tries to keep you trapped in the multiplex of the mind. Our eyes are not viewers they are also projectors that are running a second story over the picture that we see in front of us all the time. FEAR is writing that script, and the working title is: I’ll Never Be Enough
If you listen to the voice of your ego, there will always be someone else doing something better than you. No matter what you gain the ego will not let you rest. It will tell you that you cannot stop until you’ve left an indelible mark on the earth, until you’ve achieved immortality. How tricky is the ego that it would tempt us with something that we already possess?
Let the Universe know what you want while letting go of how it comes to pass. Your job is not to try to figure out how it’s going to happen for you, but to open the door in your head and when the door opens in real life, just walk through it and don’t worry if you miss your opportunity because there are always doors opening. They keep opening until you are ready to walk through them. You are ready and able to do beautiful things in this world and after you walk through that door, you will only ever have two choices, “Love” or “Fear” – Choose Love and never let FEAR turn you against your playful heart!"
submitted by Christy Monson
Fear: Facing the Unknown Alone
Megan, age 21 and an only child, returned from burying her parents in a double funeral. They had been killed when her father's small plane went down in turbulent weather. She felt devastated. No! Worse than that! Words were not adequate to describe her feelings. Her insides felt like they'd been hashed through a meat grinder. She could hardly breathe.
She still had their house—her childhood home—to clean out, and the estate to settle. No time for that now. She had to return to her new job tomorrow. She'd only worked there six weeks—since college graduation a couple of months ago.
What was she going to do?
How would she handle life?
She had always relied on her parents for advice.
Now she faced the unknown world alone.
This sweet client of mine faced a bleak situation. Tougher than most of us will have to confront.
Megan went to work the next day, and each day thereafter. But she seemed to wilt during this period of intense grief, locking emotional self away during her job and daylight hours, and falling apart in grief after dark.
Megan felt frozen with fear. She just knew she would never be able to live a normal, healthy life.
CLICK HERE to read more and join us on Life's About Choices Radio when Christy discusses "Beyond Fear". CLICK HERE to access the radio interview.
All Adversity Business Challenge Eating Fitness Forgiveness Goals Habit Happiness Happy Health Hero Hollywood Jack Canfield Life Magic Marriage Martial Money Power Responsibility Self Strength Tour Wealth Weight Loss Women