Anyone remotely familiar with any of the Star Wars movies will be familiar with this statement, "These Are Not The Droids You Are Looking For!"
The Star Wars movies show us how the Jedi Masters are able to "change a person's mind" on any particular subject.
As I thought about this, I thought about how each of us is our own Jedi Master and we each have the capability of changing our own mind or beliefs.
Consider the person who believes he or she is unable to "HAVE", "BE", or "DO" whatever he or she desires in his or her life?
Where did this belief come from? Somewhere, sometime in your life, you were told that there were things in your life that simply were not possible for you. Well, what if you gave yourself permission to be your own Jedi Master and after each negative thought you have, you immediately say, "this is not the thought you want to think" and then replace the negative thought with opposite thinking?
Opposite thinking is exactly what it sounds like - thinking the opposite of something that has been on your mind.
Negative Thought Opposite Thinking
I will never be healthy Being healthy is within my power
I will never be wealthy I have the power to create my own streams of wealth
I will never have a healthy loving relationship I know my soul mate is out there waiting for me
I will never amount to anything Whoever said I would never amount to anything was wrong
You begin to get the idea, right? Actually this is no Jedi mind trick. Opposite thinking has been around for hundreds of years, it's what most of us call "Positive Thinking"! But first you must give yourself permission to start asking the question, "is that true, or is this something I have always believed because this type of thinking has always been my habit?"
Once you realize that YOU have the power over your thoughts and every choice you make is based on what you BELIEVE to be true, you now begin to see how you have the power to manifest anything you desire into your life.
The challenge isn't whether or not you deserve it, the challenge is whether or not you BELIEVE you deserve what you want. Many people have wants in their life but few people believe they deserve to have what they want because of the limited way they think.
I am sure, if you really think about it, everything you think you "can't have" is because somewhere, sometime in your life, someone told you that you can't have it. These people don't tell you this because they are trying to make your life miserable, they tell you these things because they also have limiting beliefs.
What about the person who said:
Every generation evolves when they are ready to let go of things that no longer serve them. Holding on to limiting beliefs will never serve you so when are you going to give yourself permission to stop believing negative thoughts?
Try this exercise: make a list of everything you want in your life. Now look at your list and as you read each of your wants, listen to that thought inside your head telling you WHY you can't have it. Then, take that negative thought and do some "opposite thinking." Commit to doing this exercise every single day for 30 days (if you skip one day you must start all over because it takes 21 to 30 days to create a habit) and see what happens.
I will be looking forward to hearing about each of your wants that became your reality.
If you are doubtful that this exercise can work, well... let me just say this, "that is not the thought you want to believe!"
All I ever wanted was to have children and be the best mom I could ever be. I wanted to be the mom I never had and I believed that if I did everything the opposite of the way my mother parented me, then I would be the BEST mom in the world!
While I was raising my daughters I found myself repeating this particular phrase, over and over, "There is no manual to be a parent. How am I supposed to know if I am making the right choice? What if I make a choice that affects them forever? How am I supposed to know if I am being too strict or not strict enough? Am I empowering my child or disempowering her? Yikes, how will I know how the decisions I am making today will affect her later on in life?"
Oh sure, there are thousands of books on parenting but I am sure every parent in the world will agree that there are things that come up during child rearing that they can't find in books because every single child is unique. You can raise 5 children in the same family and yet each child will grow up with a different perception of his or her childhood.
And yet, I hear of so many adults who blame the way their life turned out on their parents, when the truth is, your adult life is the way it is because of the choices you make.
The time for "victim mode" is over. It's not what happens to you in your life that matters but what you do with what happens to you. Every single day there are more and more women who are speaking up and talking about atrocities, traumas, mental abuse, physical abuse, verbal abuse, sexual abuse, abandonment and so much more and these women are finding that by sharing their stories they are actually helping themselves and others to let go of their negative childhood experiences.
We can no longer place blame on the parents of adults who choose to make poor choices in their life. When you look back at generation after generation and you see poor choices made by the parents and grandparents that are handed down to the children you can see how these choices have become habit. Parents parent the way their parents parented them and the cycle continues until someone learns to break the cycle.
When you understand that, as an adult, every single choice you make is based on your beliefs (what you believe to be true), most people live their life based on their habits, they are actually living their life in an unconscious state. We function every single day in habit mode. From the time we wake up, our morning routine, what side of the bed we sleep on, how we brush our teeth, the daily drive to and from work is all done through habit. Just like these mundane routines that we rarely give a second thought to, so are the habits of our thinking.
Why do you believe what you believe? Who TOLD you it is true? And whoever told you, have you ever wondered who told them? It is time to start living our lives through consciousness rather than unconsciousness (habit). Why do you buy the brands you use, the car you drive, the career you have, your views on religion, sex, relationships. Where do your beliefs on these subjects come from and how can you change these beliefs if your life isn't what you had hoped for?
All change begins by giving yourself permission to question your beliefs.
When you are ready to evolve your thinking, your life will also evolve.
We are all walking around as layers of those who came before us. Those people who influenced our life either positively or negatively. We can all remember that awesome teacher who made such an impact in our life and yet many of us can also remember that teacher who negatively impacted our life. You are who you are based on how these teachers, parents, events, family members, peers, etc. impacted your life whether the impact was negative or positive.
We are the sum of our experiences and who we come into contact with. So what happens when we are negatively affected by someone who we had no say over being in our life? These people have also taught us, even if what they taught us was how we did not want to be!
At a very early age, I knew I wanted to be a different mother than my mother. There was no manual telling me how to do it, I simply knew that I never wanted to inflict experiences on my children that were inflicted on me. We all have the power to give the gift of change to generations to come but we will never accomplish this if we stay in "victim mode."
What is your J.O.B. (Jump Outta Bed)? If you don't wake up every morning looking forward to your J.O.B. what are you going to do to make the necessary changes to turn your negatives into positives? Many people SAY they want to make changes but few are willing to change the habits that have gotten them where they are.
When you are ready to live an empowered life, start with your beliefs. Give yourself permission to ask, "is that true? Or is that what I have always believed to be true and I never thought to question it?"
If you are ready to change your life and are looking for the right questions, HEALING THE CHILD WITHIN, LIFE IS ALL ABOUT CHOICES can help show you what questions to start asking.
Remember, parenting doesn't come with an instruction manual but we do have the power to change who we are as adults, regardless of the way we were parented!
Women tend to be natural born nurturers.
We love to help.
We are always "doing" for others.
When you think about what women want most (to be heard, valued, understood), the question bears asking, "why are women always giving to the point of exhaustion?
Yes, you "choose" to allow others to take these things from you. Every woman has a choice about how she will allow others to interact in her life. We teach people how to treat us!
When you understand that every choice you make is based on a belief that you have, you can now ask yourself the following questions:
Every woman on this planet is meant to shine like the brightest star in the sky because EVERY woman matters. Every woman should be heard, valued and understood. Every woman has the ability to live an empowered life.
Let's begin with the obvious question. Ask yourself, "when do I give away my power?"
Here is where the self-empowerment starts: when you can ask that question and find an answer that does not blame another person, place or event. We all have times when something happens in our life and we truly feel that the event was caused by someone or something else. But the truth is, we create our reality.We all have stories that we tell ourselves about why we are so good at certain things, how we have risen above situations and challenges and even why we choose to live the life we live.
But what about those stories we tell ourselves about why we "CAN'T" do something? I'm not smart enough, rich enough, educated enough, popular enough, healthy enough, it's my job and if I don't do it I will get fired, he/she is so tired so I should help them, (the list goes on and on). These stories and others like them keep us from living the abundant life we are meant to live.
Where do these stories come from? Have you ever asked yourself, "When did I first start to believe that I was incapable of something? When did I first start to believe that it is my duty to put others before myself?"
When you give yourself permission to ask where your stories come from and then take it a step farther and ask, "Is this absolutely true or could there be another answer?" This is when your mind is now open to possibilities that can absolutely change your life!
When you are ready to live a self-preserving life, you will begin to see opportunities when someone wants a piece of your time, your livelihood, your expertise, or even your strength and the kindest answer you can give is "NO!". This is the kindest answer you can give because your are finally valuing yourself enough to stop putting the needs of others before your own.
If you are worn out, tired, overworked, depressed, and sad, it is possible that you are not being heard, valued and understood.
When you are ready to value your "SELF" others will see your value as well. Strive to be "self-preserving" every single day and watch the abundance unfold before your very eyes!
Yours In Health,
I see so many posts on Social Media that state verses such as, "Thank you for sending me what I need instead of what I wanted."
These quotes and others like them limit our thinking.
Because we only know what we know and believe the thoughts we think, how can we ask for more than we think we deserve?
You are capable of so much more than you believe you are!
Every person on this earth is capable of doing so much more than they think they can because we all have limiting beliefs.
Our limiting beliefs come from:
Learn to change your thinking from victim mentality to one of responsibility and empowerment. If you don't know how to reach this level of belief in your life, find the people who do understand and connect with them. Living an empowered life is a dream come true and the world is yours; all you have to do is ASK, BELIEVE and RECEIVE.
What you THINK ABOUT, you BRING ABOUT. Let's start thinking about Love instead of Fear, Peace instead of War, Abundance instead of Lack, Belief instead of Doubt. My wish for you is that your life be one of inspiration, motivation and empowerment!
At a very early age, I learned there were people who know so much more than me.
My parents taught me everything they could...
They taught me to play small, it was safer than thinking I could amount to something
They taught me my self worth, I had none and should always remember this
They taught me that girls are less than boys
My father taught me that a girl is helpless when a man wants sex
My mother taught me that keeping quiet and not speaking my mind is much safer
Yes, at a very early age, I began to learn about the people who know so much more than me
My teachers told me to learn "this way" but I could not. This is when the people who know so much more than me told me that I was un-teachable.
My classmates told me what to wear and what I needed to do to "fit in" but I did not have the means or ability to take their advice. These classmates who knew so much more than me helped me to understand that I did not fit in and would be better off keeping to myself.
The religious leaders I sought to help me get rid of the fear and anxiety that was ever present in my home life told me I was a sinner and should repent or I will never be able to enter the gates of heaven because I do not honor the parents who bring me such pain and sadness.
These people who knew so much more than me helped me to understand my value and my self-worth.
One day I heard a man teaching and he said "you are worthy, you have value." But I said, "I'm sorry, you are mistaken. There have been so many people in my life who have taught me that I have no value, and that it would be best for me to play small in my life because this will keep me safe." But the man's words would not go away. Again he told me, "you are a gift, you are unique. There is no one else in this world who has your talents and heart. Keep sharing the gift that is you and you will help show others "The Way!"
But how can this be, there have been so many people who know so much more than me who have told me never to try.
Who are they, these people who know so much more than me? Where did they get their information? Could they have gotten their information from someone who knew so much more than they?
And where did those people get their information?
I am told that I have a bright light inside me, and this light is God. God is in me and he is waiting for me to understand that those people who I thought knew so much more than me were also taught by someone who they thought knew so much more than them.
And then God told me, Forgive them, bless them and and let them go, for they were there to teach you strength. These people who knew so much more than me gave me such tremendous strength to break free of what they taught me. They gave me tremendous strength to ask, "Is it true, all those limiting beliefs you taught me? Am I now free to accept new beliefs? Am I now free to believe in the gift that is me and the purpose I serve in this lifetime?
And the God in me answered "Yes, follow me. For I am you and together we will teach a new belief. We will teach those who are ready to accept their gift who they are and encourage them to question all that was taught to them by the people who they thought knew more than they. All that question what they were taught will experience freedom, abundance and peace. They will live a guilt-free life knowing they no longer have to be bound by limiting beliefs.
And so it is. I chose to let go of the fear and anxiety that was taught to me by those I thought knew so much more than me and follow the God in me to encourage others of their value, their gifts and their abilities.
And this is what I learned...
Those people, who I thought knew so much more than me, could only teach me what others had taught them. My life today is not based on how others see me, but how I see myself!
Mastering Your Beliefs Mentor
I recently attended a fundraiser and met a Marine who had served in Vietnam. He started talking about his tour of duty and told me that while he and several of his friends had just dug into a foxhole, he volunteered to go get some water. He got 20 meters from the foxhole when the foxhole was hit by enemy fire and exploded. He watched his friends, who he had just been talking to moments before, die in front of his eyes.
This Marine retired from service with a Purple Heart and another medal for sustained acts of heroism or meritorious service. He then said to me, "For so many years I asked myself, why did they die and I lived?"
My answer was this, "no one knows how they will affect the lives of others in our lifetime." He smiled and told me that after Vietnam he served and retired from the police force. He said, "one day I was called to a domestic dispute and the husband was going to kill his wife so I had to kill the husband. Several years later that same wife sent me a small trophy and a note saying thank you for saving my life. If you had not been there that night, I would surely be dead and I wanted to send you this trophy as my way of telling you how much I appreciate you saving my life."
Unfortunately, there are so many survivors of war, childhood traumas, natural disasters and violence that find it difficult to move forward because they can't move past their feelings of survivor's remorse.
What if the question isn't, "why did I survive" and the question is actually, "what am I doing with my gift of life?"
The adult who has not moved past childhood traumas, survivors of life threatening illnesses, the soldier who can't let go of what he or she has witnessed, the person who has suffered a violent act to their person or someone they love may ask the question, "why me?" But these questions and others like them only allow them to create more resistance to what they are trying to put behind them. Their questions are merely a distraction which is causing them not to address the real issue.
Why do we torment ourselves with the thought of, "I don't deserve....?"
Every person on this planet is a gift but not every person realizes the gift that they are. When you fully realize each and every person is unique and there are no two people who share the exact same gifts, you begin to understand the value that you add to the lives of others.
Whether you are an artist, teacher, policeman, fireman, paramedic, doctor, lawyer, gardner, construction worker, painter, singer, actor; (the list is endless) there is no other person quite like you. The realtor who brings joy and happiness into the lives of the people he sells a home to cannot bring joy and happiness into his client's lives without the gifts of the construction workers, plumbers, electricians and landscapers that created the house. No person is more important than the next and yet each person brings value to the lives of others.
We are all here as part of one big energy source. When each of us embraces the value of who we are and the gift that we are, we are adding our gift to the collective energy source.
What are you doing to be Loud & Proud about the gift that you are and the value you bring to the lives of others? There are too many people who think that living a life of EGO means they are being boastful or bragging. When you understand that EGO stands for Edges Gifts Out you begin to understand that living an ego based life keeps you from being the gift that you are and
Would you like to know the secret to happiness?
The easy answer is to do more things that make you happy. But I hear so many people tell me they are unhappy because their job is too demanding, their relationships are too demanding, their children are too demanding; well... you get the picture!
So, how do you change the feeling of having people and situations putting demands on you and your time and create the happiness that you are looking for?
First, start with a list. Create a list of 25 to 50 things that truly make you happy. This list should contain items that make you so happy, you could do any of the things on the list, all day long, and never get tired of any of them. Give yourself permission to go wild and add things to your list whether you believe they are possible to obtain or not.
Once you have your list, look very closely at what you have listed on your page and after each item ask yourself, "how often do I DO this?"
If this is a list of things that make you TRULY HAPPY, why are you not doing more of each of the things on the list? I already know what your answer is going to be to this question; you are going to tell me that you don't have time, or a million other excuses that you can come up with. But, the truth is, you don't do more of what's on your list because that is your "choice".
Every choice we make is based on what we "believe" to be true. And everything that we believe to be true was taught to us by someone at a very early age. If you are invited to a family function but spending time with your family is not on your list of things that make you happy, why would you go? Because you "believe" you have no choice. But, you DO have a choice. When you tell yourself or others that you have no choice, you are allowing yourself to be in "Victim Mode" and whenever you are in "Victim Mode" you are actually giving your power away. When you strive to be empowered in your life, it means that you are making choices that best serve you and your mental, spiritual and physical happiness to live a guilt-free life.
Now that you know the secret to happiness is doing more of what makes you happy, what are you going to choose to do differently in your life? Remember: Life Is All About Choices, YOU have the power to choose to do more of everything on your list or choose to come up with a million excuses of why you "can't" do what is on your list. REMEMBER: nothing is impossible.
Impossible - Even the word itself says, "I'm Possible!"
Wishing you a life of happiness!
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