Kim Kardashian chose to wear a dress to the 2016 Grammy awards that created quite a Twitter stir with other celebrities such as Pink and Bette Midler. As I read the twitter comments flying across my Twitter feed, I couldn't help but ask the question, "Does Success Depend on Body Image?"
Most people would agree that Kim would seem to have a high sense of self-confidence, and self-esteem when she chose to wear that dress to the Grammy's. But, as almost every woman can attest to, we have all worn something that someone else told us looked fabulous on us only to feel self conscious about how we look once we left the dressing room and are no longer listening to the the well meaning comments from the sales person.
Hollywood is famous for bringing us women we would love to emulate, copy or feel as though we are living vicariously through them or the life they portray to the public. Regardless of your opinion about Kim's dress, there are many women who would love to be in her shoes. But the question that bears asking is this, "why would anyone want to live another person's life when you have no idea of the price that person has paid (or continues to pay) to live her life?
There are so many people who are trying to bring something better into their lives; better health, more wealth, more happiness, a better job, more clients, more friends, better friends, happier relationships so they are looking at the people who get noticed the most in our society. The message that is constantly going around is, "If you want to look like this, buy this, if you want to feel like this, buy this, if you want to change who you are, buy this; needless to say, you can buy just about anything to have what you want to bring bring into your life.
But... will those things truly bring you the happiness you're seeking?
It's only natural that we would seek out the people who are doing what we want to do in our own life. It's absolutely wonderful that you are going out and seeking the people who are doing what you want to do, be or have in your life to learn how they did it so you can bring that same opportunity into your life as well.
But here is the most important part of that process, make sure that when you are seeking these people out and learning how they did what you want to do, that you apply this knowledge to who you are instead of trying to "BE" them.
Each one of us is unique, each one of us has our own unique gifts and talents and we are all here to live our own life's journey. But there are so many people out there who think they have to copy someone else in order to be, do or have what they want in this life.
Often it's difficult for us to be who we are and let others see our authentic self because we fear being judged. So we will walk, talk, look, act like, or copy someone else in an effort to "fit it" or be part of the "in crowd" and this is such an exhausting way to live.
Before we can let others see who we are, we must first learn who we are. "You can compliment someone on her new shoes but only she knows how much they hurt her feet!" People go to such lengths to please others before they understand how to be self-pleasing.
Average people march to the beat of some else's music but people who have truly created happiness in their life create their own music.
Here are the facts, Kim chose to wear the dress she wore, some people cheered her on and others chose to share negative opinions. Some of the negative opinions were given in an attempt for women to understand that who we are on the inside is more important than what we portray on the outside. Mother Theresa never wore designer clothes or jewelry and yet many people, including Heads of State vied to share her company. If we can always remember that when we want to improve our life in any way it's important that we remain authentic to who we truly are and to know why we are here and where we are going.
Again I ask the question, "Does Success Depend on Body Image?"
If you consider answering this question with a "yes" you must also consider what body image means to you. Can you look in the mirror and know that the image staring back at you is already perfect? When you know that you are perfect, just the way you are, you will no longer waste precious energy trying to be someone you are not. When the term "Body Image" can be defined as "whatever you see in the mirror", and you know that whatever you see is perfect, you then give yourself permission to add to perfection.
Let's teach our teenage girls that body image equals perfection and there is absolutely nothing required to be better than who they already are. Let's also give women everywhere permission to know that they are already perfect and perfection is based on how you feel.
Life isn't about becoming average, life is about no longer trying to avoid the fear of "not fitting in" instead, always search for what makes you happy. Follow your bliss and body image will become just a phrase that tells you the person staring back at you in the mirror is already perfect!
Nancy Mueller ~ Empowerment Sensei for Women
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