I watch her as she continuously checks her surroundings to make sure she maintains her balance; my mother walks with a cane, thus she walks very slowly.
I am a very patient person, and I have found ways to help (i.e. getting a shopping cart for her to lean on) but my 7th day in town, I found myself feeling very impatient with the amount of time it was taking for her to walk from the car to the store.
I noticed my feelings of impatience, I asked myself why this was a problem. Why now? Why after 7 days of experiencing how slow she walks was I feeling impatient at this time? As I rushed to get a shopping cart for her to lean on (in the hopes of speeding up her walk from the car to the store), I continued to check in with myself as to why I was feeling annoyed. I felt a huge urge to go into the store and wait for her from inside the store instead of walking next to her.
I resisted the urge to wait for her from inside the store, but I could feel my impatience mounting!
When I arrived in Ohio, the weather was unusually warm for December in Ohio. I enjoyed the fall like weather that hovered around 60 degrees and dipped into the low 50’s at night. But on this day, 7 days after my arrival, winter was truly upon us and my California jacket was no match for the cold Ohio temperatures; it was time to buy myself a winter coat.
I chose a stylish TAHARI black, down filled coat that went past my knees. Add to that some warm gloves and a fluffy scarf (both purple of course!!!) and I was ready for the cold weather that had suddenly found its way to Canton, Ohio!
As we stepped up to pay for our purchases, the clerk seemed rather confused when I asked her to cut the tags off my items, so I could wear them out of the store. She looked around as if to say, “where is the coat you walked in with?” I smiled at her and said, “I just moved here from California and my jacket is no match for the weather.”
As we walked outside, my mother walking slowly and me all bundled up in my winter wear, I felt toasty warm and comfortable. It took me a moment to realize that I was no longer impatient with how slow my mom was walking! That’s when I understood the basis for my impatience. It wasn’t that I was impatient with my how slow my mom was walking, it was the fact that I was cold and uncomfortable.
How many times have you felt frustrated, angry, impatient or resentful? The problem is never the problem. Whenever we think a problem exists, it’s usually the end result of several things we chose to previously ignore. Had I purchased a coat when I first arrived, I would have been prepared for the cold weather.
Whenever we feel the urge to take out our frustrations on another person, we are giving in to negative energy. How we view our circumstances is a choice; we always have the power to change what we believe is a negative experience into a positive experience; simply by taking 100% responsibility for every thought, action or situation we create.
Nancy Mueller ~ Life Empowerment Sensei