When people see my picture beside this star, they often ask me whose star I am posing next to.
The answer is, "It's My Star. My Hollywood star has the name of my first book written in bright gold letters!”
The day I got my star, I was working as a Tour Guide in Hollywood and even though I knew the 5 categories for the stars on the Walk of Fame are (Motion Pictures, Television, Radio, Recording and Live Performance/Theater) I still chose a book title for my star. I chose a book title because at the time, I had just published my first book and this seemed like the perfect way for me to celebrate!
Part of the reason this book is so special to me, is because I wrote it while going through my divorce after 32 years of marriage. Even though at the time of my divorce, I believed my life was over and everything I had worked for had been taken from me, I guess I had a lot that needed saying before my healing could begin.
I was very proud of my dedication and determination to write, finish, and publish the book even though I had absolutely no idea what I was doing. At the time, I didn’t know the first thing about publishing a book. I just knew that I had something inside me that was burning to come out and I allowed it to happen.
Every single time something came up during the writing, editing and publishing stage of my book that I didn’t know how to do, someone or something was put in my path to show me what I needed.
Now, seven years later and having just published my 3rd book, I sometimes look at my first book with the knowledge I have now and I am often tempted to rewrite my first book or withdraw it from publication. But I resist the urge to do that because to me, it’s not about the book! It’s about what the book represents to me…
To me, my first book represents my willingness to FINALLY, for the first time in my life, “SPEAK MY TRUTH!” I can’t remember any time in my life when I was so hurt, so devastated, so ashamed, so paralyzed with fear and so doubtful about who I was as a person and what was going to happen to me, as I was during my divorce.
As I traveled my journey of divorce, I learned I no longer had to be the strongest person in the room, that it was OK to cry in front of strangers and people I know, that it’s OK to ask for help, that it is OK to receive help, that I no longer had to pretend my life was perfect and most of all, my divorce taught me that I matter and that never again did I need to make myself “less than” so someone else could be “more than” because my needs are imperative to my mental, emotional, spiritual, and physical health.
I lost everything during my divorce and then, I found myself! This is why I believe that my first book is worthy of a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame!
No, the city of Hollywood did not extend an invitation for me to have a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame, but there is a vendor located at Hollywood and Highland who offers tourists an opportunity for a "photo shoot" of whatever memory you would like to take home from your Hollywood experience. Because the publication of my first book is a very memorable moment for me; I believe it is “star” worthy!
If you are walking your own journey and experiencing the 3 Stages of Divorce, I encourage you allow whatever is burning inside of you to come out and be known.
As you walk your own journey of divorce, walk it as the warrior that you are because this is truly your own personal hero’s journey in this thing we call “LIFE”.
Nancy Mueller ~ The Mastering Your Beliefs Sensei