I like to imagine when my soul was choosing to incarnate into this lifetime, that God and I had a conversation about what my karmic journey would entail.
When God asked, “what will you choose as your life’s mission?”…
(because that’s not a decision I’d want to make on a whim!)
I’m sure I gave it careful consideration before I answered, “I want to remind women that it’s not what happens to them that matters; it’s what they do with what happens! I want to teach women that if they’ve been victimized, it does not make them a victim!
I want to remind women to never allow a past experience to determine their value.”
God smiled and asked me, “Are you sure? Are you sure that’s what you want to teach women?”
I looked at God in surprise and said, “of course. Don’t you think it’s important that women never think less of themselves just because another person forces their will on them?”
God smiled again and said, “of course I do. I want all of my daughters to know that nothing can ever take away their value!”
Feeling quite proud of my choice, I smiled up at God and said, “good, then I’m ready to get started!”
That’s when God smiled at me and said, “thank you for what you’re about to do.
I will make sure you always have everything you need to accomplish your mission during this lifetime.
The bigger the mission, the more tools you’ll need to succeed!
You know that once you’re born, this conversation will be like smoke lingering just out of your mind’s reach, as though you’re trying to recall something from a dream.
With the most determined voice I could muster, I smiled at God and said, “it’s ok, I know I can do this!”
And then I was born!
And God kept her word; she gave me everything I needed to succeed in my life’s mission.
God put me in a home with parents who made sure to victimize me. I was raised in an atmosphere of mental, physical and emotional abuse that escalated to sexual abuse by the age of 12.
As a child, I would sit and cry and ask God, “Why? Why me?”
As every cry for help went unanswered, I grew angrier.
I wanted revenge.
I wanted those people who were hurting me to know what it felt like.
I wanted to hurt them like they hurt me.
So, I learned to fight.
Until one day, I realized the fighting wasn’t helping me anymore.
Fighting kept me feeling angry, hurt, sad and trying to prove my worth.
That didn’t feel good.
😩I was so tired of being angry.
😩I was so tired of proving I was not a victim.
😩I was so tired of trying to hide from my past.
😩I was so tired of believing my past defined who I am.
😩I was so tired of feeling inferior.
😩I was so tired of living with the feelings associated with memories of my childhood.
At times, the pain was unbearable.
I longed for a softer, kinder and more peaceful way of life.
But I didn’t know how to find it and my life was becoming more painful every day.
One day, the pain was so overwhelming, I fell to my knees and cried out, “there must be another way.”
And that’s when I heard God’s voice.
That’s when I heard God say, “why are you crying daughter? Why are you in so much pain?”
With tears streaming down my face, I answered, “Life is not supposed to be this hard. I have heard so many people talk about Gods love, but where was your love when I needed it most?”
And God replied, “it’s inside you, where it’s always been.
Your struggles only happen when you search for my love outside of yourself, once you remember who you are, the need to learn through pain will end.
💖Remember who you are
💖Remember why you chose to be born and the mission you chose to teach
💖Remember the conversation we had when you chose this life
I have kept my promise to you
I have given you everything you need to teach women why they should never question their value.”
That’s when I realized that what I thought had been done TO me, had actually been done FOR me…
And because of that,
I’m here to remind women that…
“YOUR GREATEST ACHIEVEMENTS WILL NEVER HAPPEN AS LONG AS YOU BELIEVE WHO YOU ARE, IS DETERMINED BY WHAT YOU’VE HAD TO GO THROUGH TO GET HERE.”
Stop looking for the answers outside of yourself,
Every answer you’re looking for can be found within you,
All you have to do is be open to remembering your own conversation and the mission you chose.
Remember who you are!
That’s when you too will know…
… you already have everything you need!
Instead of waiting for life to drive you to your knees, let me know if you need help remembering who you are, what you're here to do and why you're so fabulous!
Nancy Mueller ~ Life Coach and Sensei
Nancy Mueller ~ Life Sensei